Thursday, July 30, 2009

Red Light Cameras

Everyone hates these things. They do not decrease accidents at the intersections they are placed at, and they can't actually prove it was you driving the car. They do however make a lot of money for your local government.

Apparently the cameras they use are quite expensive, and as it turns out, easy to remove.

case in point:
The New York Police Department said two people have been arrested for using a cherry-picker to steal nearly 20 percent of the city's red light cameras.

Investigators said Anthony Cintorrino, 45, and Tara LaBurt, 29, used a pickup truck with a cherry-picker to steal the cameras between June 24 and the time of their arrests Sunday, the New York Post reported Wednesday.

Police said couple were arrested for allegedly selling an estimated $88,000 worth of parts from the cameras to a camera resale shop for $300 each to help finance their heroin addictions.


-source

Thats right. Fight the power!

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

The Ultimate Fighter, Stranger Fetish- Furries/Adult Baby

The Ultimate fighter... no not the TV show
Our buddy Fish over at Fish on Fighting had a post about the qualities the "ultimate fighter" would posses. I like his list and agree with a lot of what he said. Someone at The Examiner did a write up on the same thing Creating the perfect mixed martial artist

In my mind there are really two things that separate the champs from the chumps. heart and strategy. You need to have good striking and good grappling along with a host of other physical talents. That is a given. The mental game is really where most fights are won and lost.

To me fighting starts and ends with one thing. Heart. Skills and Athleticism can only carry you so far. In a lot of fights there comes a point where nothing seems to be going a fighters way. Some persevere and come out champions, others give up.
A good example of this in a somewhat recent fight is Randy Couture vs Gabriel Gonzaga. This highlights the difference between someone without heart and someone with that will to win. On paper this was a great fight. the first minute and a half is a battle. Couture bloodies up Gonzagas face about 2 minutes in and Gonzaga just wilts. Gonzaga is one of those guys that seems like whenever things aren't going well for him he just gives up. Realistically I don't think Couture is a technically superior fighter. However, he has the heart, will, and determination of a champion. A less well known fighter to more recent fans that personified heart was Evan tanner. His fight with Rich Franklin (the first one I think)showed that it takes a special kind of person to absorb that ass kicking and prevail in the end.

The second thing I think that some fighters have that puts them on another level is strategy. Too many times you see these fighters that have the skills necessary to win, and don't use them in an intelligent manner. The two biggest offenders of this that I can think of are Jorge Gurgel and Matt Serra. Both of these guys are well known BJJ black belts, and yet when you see them fight, they never take it to the ground, they never attempt submissions, for the most part these guys choose to brawl even when facing a noted striker. One of my favorite fighters, Nick Diaz, is guilty of this. Nick is a slick BJJ practitioner and yet he often chooses to stand and bang. It could be an ego thing. I hear a lot of fighters talk about how they like to beat someone at their own game. Who knows?
The best in the business at the execution of a fight plan and taking advantage of his strengths is GSP. His comments after the second fight with BJ kind of blew my mind. There are a lot of fighters with GSP's well rounded skill-set, but no one takes advantage of their opponents weaknesses better.

Stranger Fetish- Furries/Adult Baby

On an entirely unrelated note; This week at work we have been having an ongoing conversation about strange fetishes. Now for the most part I try not to judge people on what gets them off, but some shit is just crazy.

Up for your vote this week we have the in the red corner, Furries.


Dressing up as cute animals and "boinking" would have to be pretty high up the list of weird shit to get into. To quote wikipedia "About 2% state an interest in zoophilia, and less than 1% an interest in plushophilia." Well I guess thats good...

In the Blue corner, we have not pedophiles, but Adult Babies!

Defined by wikipedia as "Paraphilic infantilism is a paraphilia characterized by the desire to wear diapers and/or be treated as an infant or toddler. One who engages in infantilistic play is known as an adult baby (AB). About one in three adult babies is also a diaper lover (DL),so they are collectively known as AB/DLs. The majority of infantilists are heterosexual males."

Which brings us to the Asshat poll of the week: Which is a more fucked up fetish, Furries or Adult Babys?

Friday, July 24, 2009

Affliction: Trilogy is CANCELED

hahahaha

Shitty...I was looking forward to see Fedor vs Barnett fight. I wonder what is going to happen for all of those tickets that were already sold. Can you even imagine the amount of money that was lost for booking an event center in LA?

I feel for Affliction, its a tough thing for a company to go through. However, does this mean that Fedor is still under contract with Affliction for one more fight?

Should be interesting next few days in the MMA news world after this mega blow.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Entourage


Must See TV

I like to think I have good taste in movies and TV. From time to time I will throw a recommendation up on the site. Don't expect these to be earth-shattering as these are fairly popular shows, but you can count on quality TV.

Right now we are in the middle of an Entourage binge. The story of 4 friends, one of which turns into a major movie star. The other 3 become his entourage and you get to see the craziness that goes on in Hollywood. We are in the middle of season 3 right now and we cannot get enough. It's a crazy life they live. Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven)steals the show. He plays a typical Hollywood talent agent, an intense, arrogant, asshole.

If you ever had the desire to be rich and famous this show definitely lets you kind of see that fantasy come to life.
Here are some links to entourage torrents:
Season 1
Season 2
Season 3
Season 4
Season 5

Enjoy

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Floyd "Money" Mayweather


Check out about a minute and a half in.

Basically what he says is white people made MMA because boxing was being dominated by blacks and Latinos.
First of all white people already had a sport we dominated, its called HOCKEY.

Pause for effect.

Second of all, is MMA really dominated by white people? I hadn't really thought about it before. lets see. Well, GSP is french Canadian... that's about as white as you can get. Brock Lesner kills deer for fun, was a pro wrassler, and loves Coors Light... definition of white trash.

Damn maybe Mayweather has a point.

Oh wait. LHW Kingpin Lyoto Machida is half Brazilian half Japanese. The two former LHW champs and #1 contenders are both black (rampage and Evans)

MW is owned by a black Brazilian and I'm pretty sure BJ Penn wouldn't classify himself as a white guy.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

The Shnucks Fiasco

On the night of UFC 100 I had just two main desires. For the event itself I just wanted to see Bispings face get smashed in. The other goal was to have a delicious grilled gourmet angus burger. Only one of these things got accomplished...

It all started pretty early, we would be getting together to have a few beers and throw some burgers on the grill before the fights. Bring your own food and beer. Seeing as we had neither, a trip to the grocery store was in order.

this was not going to be the typical visit to Shnucks, normally we go with a minimal list and spend at least an hour wandering around the store trying to plan out the meals for the week.
This time we had a plan, gourmet burgers or bust.

We headed straight to the meat counter and stood mesmerized by the amazing choices. Did we want jalapeno & spicy jack? Cajun blue cheese? Portbello & swiss? Bacon & cheddar? They all looked delicious.

I guess it was apparent we were having issues deciding because the meat counter guy (meat packer?) came over and started going on about how he loved these things. Naturally we asked his recommendation, after praising them all he confided that his favorite was probably the cajun burger with blue cheese. Sounded good to us. As we walk away with from the meat counter with our slobber inducing burgers the meat packer had one last recommendation. "those burgers are a little large for regular buns, one of those big rolls from the bakery makes a great bun"
Thanks again. Sounds like fire.

After picking up a case of Inbev light, we head to the front of the store to check out, in record time no less. This is when the trouble begins.

We survey the checkout lines. Two possible choices.

Aisle #1: An elderly couple paying by check. Not only are they old and paying by check, they don't appear to be in any sort of hurry. As shown by the fact that they are in what would have to be called an animated conversation with a group of store employees.
Aisle #2: Has the light on, but no person standing behind the counter.

Easy choice right? We head to Aisle 2. Usually someone would see us walk up to the empty que and come check us out. It didn't happen. I assumed the checkout person was in the group talking to the old people. I assumed right, I looked over to their group to be hit with an uninterested look by what turned out later to be the cashier for the empty register.

After a bit of a stare-down/standoff I broke down and left the empty line and got in line behind the old couple.

At this point I am going to mention something that wouldn't get brought up, but in this case it has relevance to the story. The group of employees and the elderly couple were all African Americans. Back to the story.

So we get in line behind the old people and begin the wait for them to process a check. About this time, another African American lady with a cart full of grocery's (keep in mind we have 3 items) walks up to the empty register. Immediately the lady who gave me the disinterested look breaks from the group discussion and checks this other woman out.

Right away I was pissed. We had walked away from that aisle not 30 seconds before that happened. I started whispering to my fiancee.
"racism, we just got discriminated against" She agrees that it was fucked up but not much to be done about it and it wasn't that big of a deal.

"bullshit, if it was the other way around it would be a huge deal"

To make matters worse; A few minutes after this bigotry occurred a power surge went through the store. The lights were only off for the blink of an eye but that was enough to shut all the registers down. Right as we are checking out our three items. If the cashier had broken off her conversation with her friends as quickly for us as she did for the black lady that came up later we would have been out the store.

By now I am pretty angry. Instead of being a quick trip to the store we are stuck waiting for registers to come up. The employees didn't help this situation.
"HAHA BETTER GO TO SAVE-A-LOT, OH BUT YOU CAN'T CUZ THEY DON'T SELL BEER"

"MAN I BET YOUR PISSED, THIS GUY ONLY HAS THREE THINGS"

I know everyone gets a bit excited when we don't have to work, But this was crazy. In a group of probably 25-30 customers the cashiers and baggers are throwing a party. Not only that when the manager comes around to instruct them on resetting the machines, half of them refuse!

We wait for the machines to reset. All the while the employees are getting giddy because the systems are down. They keep urging us to go to Save-A-Lot.

After much debate we finally take the hint and get out of there. (we were really craving the burgers!)

DAMN!

We head to Save-A-Lot and wander around the store trying to find something to grill. Nothing looks nearly as good as the burgers we had. We also couldn't just buy two burgers, ended up having to buy 4 burgers and 8 buns.

The story isn't over there. After our last experience with a cashier we decide to go the route of self checkout. There is only one rule of self checkout: If you don't know how to use the self checkout machine, you do not get to use it.

there are 2 people in front of us in the self checkout, 8 items total. should be quick.

The only line with a cashier has someone buying two cart loads of grocery's, no way can that beat the self checkout. Right?!?!

Wrong. This guy can't seem to grasp the concept. He scans his yogurt. The machine tells him to place item in bag. He stands there with the yogurt still in his hand, staring at the computer like it had somehow started speaking in tongues. "dur dur dur what do I do"

"YOU READ,COMPREHEND AND FOLLOW THE DIRECTIONS YOU DUMB FUCK!!!!!!!!"

I am not joking with you, it took this guy just as long to scan his 5 items as it takes the tranny cashier to check out two cart loads...

When we see the cashier finishing the transaction and the retard still scanning his 5 items, we switch lines. Uh-OH now the tranny is having problems giving change.

We look back to the self checkout to see that special ed is gone but has been replaced by big momma. Big momma is buying 33 cent dvd's. 3 of them to be exact and this big heffer can't get them scanned either. She ends up requiring manager assistance. We finish checking out our items about the time the manager emerges from the back to help big momma scan her last dvd.

To summarize, Shnucks is racist, and the dredges of society shop at Save-A-Lot.

I plan on writing a sternly worded letter to Shnucks. If they give me some free shit and an ass kissing I will consider shopping there again.


That's it for now. Enjoy your weekend!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

You are NOT PREPARED!




What happens when you are drunk, in Las Vegas, and just saw 5 dudes get there asses kicked at UFC 91??

If you are that guy in the video, you think that you soaked up the pro fighters abilities and magically turn into a bad ass prepared to take on the WORLD! By the world, I mean a raging whore that was probably popping off at the mouth.

This dude definitely thought he was a bad-ass. I mean he is wearing a GSP Affliction shirt ok? Obviously this dude is not to be messed with people!

LMAO, poor bastard must of realized that this is a bad time and place to test those newly soaked up skills he learned from Brock Lesnar because that security guard pwned his ass. He was NOT prepared...he should feel shame.

Was the security guard's technique the best? No, but it doesn't matter when you can toss someone like a ragdoll into cement stairs lol.

Ahhh...yes....harilous.

On a Side Note

10 votes so far on the who is hotter poll. Wow! That is alot IMO for a blog that is only a couple weeks old. I'm telling you guys, this blog is going to blow up! There is no other blog that can bring you stories about MMA, Movies, Crazy Rednecks, Fantasy Football, Hot bitches Females, and overall wild and funny shit like we can.

Thanks for reading and I shall see you next week

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

The Last Emporer



Dominance.

If you like MMA you should be a Fedor fan. He just wins, and every time it is impressive. He can strike, he can grapple. He has a chin, He has the will to win.

Can he be stopped?

I think he is going to stomp Barnett at the next affliction event. Josh just doesn't have that will to win. when it comes down to it, I think Fedor would die fighting rather than tap. Fedor will pressure Barnett and Barnett will wilt.

Who can stop him?

I don't know if anyone can, but you know who I would like to see try?


What a crazy match that would be.

Make it happen Dana White!

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Weed, Texas, A Shotgun, and 2 Dead Bodies...

Intrigued?

Damn right you are. Who in their right mind wouldn't be intrigued by reading that title? Hell, I'm intrigued and I am the one writing it!

So, lets get to it then mmmk?

This post is actually about two separate stories. The first one has to do with one of my favorite shows on TV, Weeds.

If you never heard of this TV show then I feel sorry for you. It's an awesome TV show about a suburban widow that for some reason or another decides to start selling weed. The show is humorous, suspenseful, and very addicting. You can be an activist against drugs, including weed, or be a pothead...its just a great series. Hell, my mom is even addicted to it lol. Currently, it is in its fifth season and it is turning out to be one of my favorite seasons as of yet.

ANYWAY

Monday's episode, A Modest Proposal, ended leaving us wondering what the fuck was going on because if we didn't speak Spanish. Well, I have the translation of what the mysterious woman said to Esteban for all of us non spanish understanding people.

The mysterious woman, Pilar, come to find out is a high level crime boss. The conversation goes as follows...

PILAR
What do you believe you are doing eh? You were already going far, dont you think (?) You had to have an adventure with a pincha gringa? It's fine that you have to have a son with her. But to marry her? Are you crazy? All eyes in Mexico are on you. All of my hopes, my effort, my money and my time are invested in you. You would have killed the slutty pincha gringa when....
ESTEBAN
Are you saying that I have to choose between you and Nancy?
PILAR
No, Esteban. I am saying you have to choose between yourself and her

So there you have it. It took me along time to find a that, so I figured I would share it.

Now to the crazy shit...

Texas, A Shotgun, and 2 Dead Bodies

This is a true story. In no way shape or form am I lying or stretching the truth. Let me start off my giving you a situation and asking you what you would do in that situation.

Its broad daylight, lets say its 2pm. You are at home and you notice that someone is breaking into your neighbors house...
FUCK!

What do you do?!? Call the police? Grab your shotgun and go Rambo style on their asses?

Well this dude did both. He noticed 2 people breaking into his neighbors house and called 911. The 911 operator spends the whole time trying to calm his crazy Texan ass down so he would not take the law into his own hands. However, the man continued to warn the 911 operator that he wasn't going to let the robbers get away. The best part is I got the actual 911 call and you HAVE to listen to this redneck talk to the 911 operator.

Its just amazing. I wish I had neighbors like this dude. The audio file is on youtube, so if you are at work and can't access youtube, come back and listen to this when your home...you will not be disappointed.

My favorite line from the audio has to be the part were the 911 operator tells him that if he goes after the robbers, that he is going to get himself killed. The man replys...

"Wanna bet?! You hear mah shotgun just click? I don't like this here stuff.....I'ma kill em."

His voice is the best. Fucking awesome.

So what happen to this guy?

Well, as you can hear from the audio file, he ends up shooting and killing both of the robbers. The police finally get there and take the man down to the station. However, Texas law states that if anyone breaks into your home, you can shoot to kill. The cops are not going to charge the man with murder because when the robbers were attempting to make their get-away, they ran across his lawn.

LAWL

I am not going to lie. I am not a big fan of Texas. Its fucking hot, filled with country rednecks, plus...they gave us George W. Bush.

After reading and hearing about this guy though, Texas FTW! This guy rocks.

On a separte note....

The article written yesterday by P, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder", tells us about conversation that men have all over this nation. Which female is hotter? P goes into more detail about this ritual and actaully has a story to tell, go read it.

I just wanted an excuse to post a picture of this Natasha Sun. The UFC's new ring octagon girl.

Like woah...

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

It's true, more true than I ever thought. In my mind, people had preferences for different features, but overall beauty was probably something ingrained in us by society, or even genetics. (there have been scientific studies where infants are shown to be drawn to attractive people more than unattractive people)

The other day though I had a conversation that changed my ideas forever. It all started with the always fun hottest chick conversation. We are at work playing the name your top 3 hottest celebrity variation of this game. Most of the time when this conversation comes up everyone has different names, much googling (or binging seeing as google is blocked at my workplace) follows and everyone agrees that while their choices don't match up, all the ladies are super hot and it pretty much comes down to preference. Not often does a name come out where people are just like "no way, not hot whatsoever"
In fact, in the 12 years that I have been taking part in this male ritual of discussing hot women we all have no chance with, I have never come across someones suggestion that was so universally shot down. I have taken parts in some heated debates on this subject (a particular favorite of mine: Gwen Stefani NOT HOT!)
Normally what happens is the one or two people who do not find the person in question hot get ganged up on by the group. The group routinely overrules the dissenter saying while she may not be his choice, the subject is in fact hot and the conversation continues.
By now you have to be wondering, "Who was the person so utterly not hot that the group had to go against tradition"

I give you Exhibit A; Kirsti Alley

Not only was she in this guys top 3, she was number one!
After much shock, disbelief, and some unflattering pictures of Kirstie Alley, we managed to get him to assign a number rating of 7 on the 1 to 10 scale. Which while a little high, it is not so terribly insane that we had to call him out. This guy though, would not leave it alone. Later in this conversation after he has been ridiculed into silence, we are discussing the lovely Olvia Munn (Exhibit B).


This is the time when Kirsti's Fanboi decides to chime back into the conversation to drop the bomb that Kirsti Alley is more attractive than Olvia Munn!?!?!

This brings us to our first ever "Asshat Poll of the Week" please vote on the right side of the page.

Who is Hotter Olvia Munn or Kirsti Alley?

#1 Pound for Pound Fighter...PERIOD!

Hiya hiya

UFC 100 has finally come and past. First off, let me just say that it was probably one of the best overall cards that I have ever seen since ordering PPV fights back in 2004. It was also the first time in a long time that I was correct in picking all of the main card fights.

Alan Belcher got ROBBED against Yoshihiro Akiyama via decision and that is the only reason why I went 5 out of 5 lol. Its messed up, but hey, IMO if you don't want to take the chance of judges screwing you....you should have finished the fight.

I am finally 100% a GSP fan. That dude is ridiculous and in my opinion he is the best pound for pound fighter in the world, in any weight class.

Disagree? Here is why...

  • The 170 pound division is probably the most talent rich weight class in the UFC. There isn't another weight class that has more legit contenders to compete against.
  • Secondly, GSP has taken ALL challengers. Fedor on the other hand has the better record and is consider to be the best pound for pound fighter in the world by numerous people, but he doesn't take on all challengers. He isn't consistently testing his ability against the best fighters in his weight class.
  • Lastly, it is my opinion that the list of "the best pound for pound" fighters should be ranked more heavily for their current accomplishments, not just their career ones. GSP has defended his title against the best welterweights in the world minus Jake Shields (Strikeforce). Fedor's last opponent that was any sort of threat was Andrei Arlovski....nough said.

Whats Next??

Its a lock that GSP and Anderson Siliva are going to fight each other in 2010.

Also, Dana White stated "Fedor will be in the UFC" at the post-fight conference on Saturday night. I really would be surprised if that happens. Dana does have to find someone to challenge that over sized bulldog that is foaming at the mouth with rabies. (Brock Lesnar)

I'm OUT

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Why I love fighting



I couldn't have said it more perfectly myself.
I dare you to name a more pure form of competition

Your First Time

The other day, my fiancee related a story to me that was told to her by one of her middle aged co-workers.

I don't remember a lot of the details but it involved the story of how this lady got married at 17 years old (still married today, impressive). Near the end of the story my fiance said
"so basically she got married just to do it"

I nodded sagely and said that's why I was marrying HER. Her facial expression told me immediately I had said the wrong thing.

"but we have already done it" she said with a confused look in her eyes.

It was then I realized the mistake I made. Here I was thinking this woman was wise beyond her years, she didn't want to get married to please society and indulge in the wedding industrial complex. She wanted to be married because she found the "one" and wanted nothing more to be bonded to this person forever. At least thats what I thought originally.

Turns out though that she was merely getting married so she "could have sex".

"Could have sex" is in quotations because we all know in reality she could have had sex without getting married. The thought that someone would get married to satisfy the lust in their loins blows my mind. It got me thinking...

What if you had to marry the first person you had sex with? Suspend your disbelief for a moment and just think about it.

After I muttered this question aloud My fiancee and I both made a face as if we had smelled sour milk and developed some wicked gas at the same time.

Needless to say (but I'm going to anyway) I don't think it would work out well.

I could be wrong. Maybe your first was Megan Fox.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

UFC 100, New Mating Info, History is bullshit

UFC 100
Being the avid MMA fan that I am I would be skirting my responsibility of being a fight fan to not mention it. UFC 100, while not the 100th UFC is a milestone of sorts and an incredible fight card in its own right. I will spare you the breakdown (as professionals have already done that)

Instead I will give you a few things I am looking forward to in the card and my picks.

Lesner V Mir Since I started watching the UFC one of the things that really drew me to it was the fact that the most athletic guy is not always the winner. Size, Strength, Speed, while needed, were always secondary in my mind to skill. I have seen little guys knock out big guys, and sculpted hard bodies run out of gas against beer bellys. Lesner is starting to change that for me. You cannot argue that his physical attributes contribute greatly to his success. I am looking forward to seeing if Mir can out skill those advantages, and if Lesner can use all his physical tools to be a complete fighter.
My Pick: Lesner by donkey kong

GSP V Alves GSP has always been the freak bully of the welter weight division. He weighs in at 170 but by fight time is often 190. He does have the skills needed to dominate but it will be interesting to see if he can do it against someone even more freakish than him. Weighing in at 170 Alves tips the scales at fight time around 200 pounds.
My Pick: GSP pulls it out, but if I were a betting man Alves would get the money laid on him (good value at the odds)

Henderson V Bisbing I used to like Bisbing. Then I watched the TUF season he coached, and man is that guy a douche. I hope to see Henderson re-arrange his face.
My Pick: Henderson by wtfpwnage

This will increase your chances to mate...
Well maybe not, but the idea that women are more choosy when it comes to partners has been around a long time. A recent study conducted by Northwestern University shows that this may not be the case.

In a new study from Northwestern University, 350 college-age men and women attended speed-dating events. In half of the games of romantical chairs, the guys went from girl to girl; in the other half, the girls went from guy to guy. Each pair got four minutes to chat, after which they evaluated their interest in each other. When it came to the events where men worked the room, everyone performed just as expected: The men were less selective than the women. But when the usual speed-dating routine was turned on its head and the women made the rounds, the guys were more selective and the ladies were less picky.
- Salon.com

What does this mean for your mating success? Let them come to you. Maybe the reason for all the rejection comes not from your horrible appearance and personality, but from the fact that you are actually coming up to them.
This will no doubt be picked up by Mystery to aid in teaching helpless men to attract women.

History Is Bullshit and I have a link to prove it.
A book review about a book that goes into the idea that history isn't always as we taught it. Reminds me of an HBO Special I once saw that extensively used the quote "When the legend becomes fact... print the legend"

It's interesting to me how time can distort all things. Maybe Bush Jr will go down as the greatest president ever one day.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Every story has a beginning

It's my 16th Birthday today and I decided to write a blog. Why would you be interested in what a 16 year old says? I have had a very interesting life, I have been through more adversity and accomplished more than most "adults". I twice survived early-stage pediatric leukemia. I was first diagnosed when I was two and the cancer returned again when i was 6. It has been 10 years and what a 10 years it has been. I got a perfect score on the SAT at the age of six. I completed high school in nine weeks, graduated from Princeton University at age 10, and finished medical school four years later. At age 14, I became the youngest licensed doctor in the country.




OK, that's not true. I am not Doogie Howser.







However, I am the author of this blog. I will be bringing you the most accurate and informative insight into our world on the blog-o-sphere.


(debate ensues in my head)
Me: well that is a pretty lofty goal you have there. Accurate AND informative insight?
Me2: I can be insightful!
Me: Just saying, that is asking for a lot. Major news networks with billions of dollars in funding can't manage to be accurate or insightful, and the information is sketchy at best.
Me2: good point. Lets scale it back a bit
Me: how bout we throw professional in there, it doesn't actually mean anything other than you get paid to do what you do, but it makes you sound more authoritative.
Me2: but I don't get paid to do this...
Me: you are an asshat.
Me2: I think you are on to something there.

Welcome to Lincoln Freed the Slaves: Home of Semi-professional Asshattery since 2009

Read it you shall, much wisdom your way will come.